Life

Song to choreo #2

2010-01-09T19:19:00.000+08:00

Chris Rice's Clumsy

Decisions

2010-01-08T23:29:00.003+08:00

I choose to not complain but contribute.

I choose to not go against the current, but to nurture stronger waves.

I choose to edify, encourage and love.

I choose to not discriminate, cause upheaval and chaos.

I choose to be a factor of peace.

I choose to accelerate change.

First questions human beings ask

2010-01-08T07:15:00.003+08:00

There is a tragedy at the heart of things’, said Martin Buber. The result of the Fall is a broken relationship with God, Adam and Eve blame each other, and then in chapter four we read that their children also fall out with each other. Cain is angry with his brother Abel.

God’s questioning continues. ‘Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it’ (Genesis 4:6-7).

We will either master sin (now through the power of the cross and resurrection and with the help of the Spirit) or else sin will master us. In Cain’s case it did. He killed his brother (Genesis 4:8). God asked him yet another question, ‘Where is your brother Abel?’ (Genesis 4:9a).

In response Cain asks the first question asked by a human being in the Bible, ‘Am I my brother’s keeper?’ (4:9b). Cain wants to avoid responsibility. He is saying, ‘Do I really have responsibility for anyone other than myself?’

This is the crucial question for today. Do we have responsibility? Do we have responsibility for the bad stuff that is happening in our city? Do we have responsibility for the bad stuff that is happening in our nation and around the world? If thirty thousand children die every day of extreme poverty, is that our responsibility?

Lord, thank you for your amazing love for us. Thank you that you have created this wonderful universe for us to enjoy. Thank you that supremely you have given us human relationships because it is not good for us to be alone.

Forgive us for the times that we have fallen for the devil's lie that we cannot trust you and that we need to experience things that you have forbidden.

Thank you that you always come searching for us. Thank you that you have sent Jesus to crush the serpent’s head. Thank you that Jesus was willing to pay the price on the cross so that we could be forgiven and the relationship restored. Although sin is often crouching at our door and desires to have us, help us to master it through your victory by the cross and resurrection and by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Help us this year not to say like Cain, ‘Am I my brother's keeper?’, but to see that we are responsible for the needs of those around us, to see the potential we have to make a difference to others people's lives and to fulfill our potential.

~One Year Bible (Day 2)
by Nicky Gumble

Song to choreo #1

2010-01-04T06:28:00.002+08:00

Choreograph something to this tune. Heard while browsing through Ted Baker in Covent Garden. Don't worry, mum, didn't spend any money.

Convicted

2010-01-04T06:02:00.004+08:00

Today, Tim Hughes, the chairperson for today's service, went up on stage and said,

'Let's take a moment together to pray for ONE thing we want to see come to past with God's providence. Be it a job opening, or that one person coming to know Christ, or that one family member you want to reach out to. Let's lift these persons and circumstances to God and ask Him to amaze us...'

So I bowed my head, gave a brief thought, and began my prayer with,

'Lord, I desire a first class honours...'

It wasn't long before I felt a twist in my heart as everyone kept in silence and as the band played in the background.

It wasn't long before Tim Hughes was about to end that 3 minute session...

I bowed my head again, gave a brief thought, and ended my prayer with,

'Lord, grant me wisdom, make me whole...'

I stood up with tears swelling in my eyes.

We choose to leave it all behind, and turn our eyes towards the prize ~'Adoration' Brenton Brown~

Audience of One

2010-01-02T18:03:00.003+08:00

I come on my knees
To lay down before you
Bringing all that I am
Longing only to know you
Seeking your face
And not only your hand
I find you embracing me
Just as I am

And I lift these songs
To you and you alone
As I sing to you
In my praises make your home

To my audience of one
You are Father, and you are Son
As your spirit flows free,
Let it find within me
A heart that beats to praise you.
And now just to know you more
Has become my great reward
To see your kingdom come
And your will be done
I only desire to be yours,
Lord

So what could I bring
To honor your majesty
What song could I sing
That would move the heart of royalty
And all that I have
Is the life that youve given me
So Lord let me live for you
My song with humility

And Lord as the love song
Of my life is played
I have one desire
To bring glory to your name

To my audience of one
You are Father, and you are Son
As your spirit flows free,
Let it find within me
A heart that beats to praise you.
And now just to know you more
Has become my great reward
To see your kingdom come
And your will be done
I only desire to be yours,
Lord

And we lift these songs
To you and you alone
As we sing to you
In our praises make your home

To my audience of one
You are Father, and you are Son
As your spirit flows free,
Let it find within me
A heart that beats to praise you.
And now just to know you more
Has become my great reward
To see your kingdom come
And your will be done
I only desire to be yours,
Lord

~"Audience of One" Casting Crowns~

Resolve

2010-01-01T09:32:00.002+08:00

Cheers to a year that ended with the best tour on the River Thames with the most amazing company, and a dinner that was most heart-warming.

Ahoi to a year that begun with the most amazing fireworks display from the London Eye, and a cheerful welcome from the Big Guy up there with a light shower of fresh snow.

Settled here in my newly refurbished room and a mug of warm honey lemon in hand, I resolve to:-

Stay focused on what I know is true
Live each day daring to move
Choose to always see the glass as half full
Keep in mind those who matters most

and

Smile =)

Have a great one, all!

Post for Random Pictures of Germany

2009-12-27T02:50:00.027+08:00

Alone in London?

2009-12-17T09:36:00.003+08:00

I really think that that thought is stupid. I can testify for one, that it is really what you make out of what you have that really counts.

See, for the past 5 days since term ended, and after everyone has left, I've actually had the most memorable experiences with great people I never thought that I'd actually get along with if all these did not happen.

Saturday was a day where I went to Covent Garden and Oxford Street with Mokshada, my roommate, and believe it or not, this is our first time that we've actually went out together!

On Sunday, after church, Vincent, Hsi Wen, Yasushi and I went to Brick Lane together, far east of London, and discovered the most dodgy, most random shops ever. These shops actually ranged from vintage wear to 'pasar malam'-like shops to food stalls of ALL kinds of cuisines! Crazy I tell you!

Monday was a day spent writing Christmas letters and packaging gifts so that I can pass them to Sean at 12am on Tuesday morning to bring them home for my family and friends.

HO! And I spent the first half of Tuesday (12am to 8am) in Heathrow Airport with Sean. Gosh, that is a story for another post =) I promise. Quite an adventure, I have to say.

And today, after running some errands for my Germany trip, I met up with Mak, Jon and Joe for lunch, took videos in the London snow, visited Huges Parry Hall and bummed at Jon's place for a bit, headed back to High Holborn Hall to make dinner with Kenneth, discovered a GREAT mash potato recipe, had Jason over to mash to potatoes for us, and spoke till 12.30 in the morning =)

My point is, your circumstance is really what you make of it. If you choose to go with what general society thinks and believe that London is a lonely place to stay in during the winter, then by golly! It'll surely be so. If you put in effort, however, and go out of your way to do things and formulate events around you, you would really find yourself discovering really wonderful things.

Trust me =)

For You Guitar Junkies

2009-12-17T02:37:00.001+08:00

Joel, get Ming, Isaac and Jer to watch this.

It's Snowed in London!

2009-12-17T00:14:00.002+08:00

Hohoho :) Check it out!

This is London

2009-12-12T07:42:00.002+08:00

You look up the weather for Sunday on your Mac and it says:-

Raining

You look up the weather for Sunday on Google, it says:-

Sunny with light showers

You look up the weather for Sunday on BBC, it says:-

Sunny intervals

-.-

Because I Can't Concentrate

2009-12-11T18:04:00.002+08:00

Life is full of contradictions, and I find them even within myself.

When I was a kid, I thought that I would never make it to university. At that point in time, everything just seemed so far away. I was quite settled with the fact that before I finish High School, the world will end. In fact, I didn't really mind if the world ended while I was in Primary School.

Paradoxically, embedded within me has been a desire to get into one of the most renowned universities and kick the smartest ass.

I'd listen to my father's stories about how he joined the Nottingham Games and won a medal for Sheffield University.

When my uncle from Germany comes to Malaysia to visit us, I'd smile at the way he tells me of how he'll bring me around Hamburg and possibly Paris if I really do head to the UK to study.

In church, I'd see person after person getting prayed for before they left to study abroad. And I remember how I'd tell myself, 'Michelle, that's going to be you. One day.'

And now, these things have came to past.

I've been to Nottingham to watch the games and sat in the hall my dad once played badminton in, I'd be heading to Germany in a week's time to visit my uncle and before all these, back home, I was prayed for in church.

Now, in my tiny little room, I look back at all these with a sense of satisfaction swelling through my veins, knowing that there is only You to thank for.

=)

2009-12-11T02:27:00.002+08:00

Only you would begin your text with..

'Hey, be like a duck...'

and end it in a way that would encourage me more than any other set of words in the world.

Thanks, silly. =) I never knew that being a duck could help that much.

For you who would be heading abroad,

2009-12-10T20:12:00.003+08:00

So it has been 3 months in. And it's only one day away from the end of the Michaelmas Term.

I have to say, people back home really do over-emphasize the shock of living alone. Dear you, living independently isn't really that bad.

Hey, you'll probably be stressing over what clothes to bring, what to expect, what to do when you're in a foreign country, what credit card to bring over. But take it from me, there is really no need for all this stress :)

Of course, there will be one fine day where you put a piece of clothing into the wash only to find out a few hours later that it has shrunk. But it's ok :) you'll laugh at your silliness and move along.

There will be times where you jump off the bus at the wrong bus stop. But it's ok :) you'll take a longer while by foot to your destination, but on the brighter side, you'll discover things you never would if you stayed on that bus.

And hey, being a student also means getting involved in societies, no? You'll mingle with people with people who would frustrate you, who would cost you your sleep, who would make you feel like tearing the wall down. But hey, these people are also the ones who would go through the same crap as you would, ones who would give you the advice you need, and most importantly, the ones who would be your friends for life.

You'll get drowned in work and studies, but hey, it's ok :) everyone else feels the same way as you do. They're just acting strong. Inside, they're crumbling like you are.

You'll miss home once in a while. But hey! Look at it this way, when you're back home, there will be things you'll miss about being abroad. So why moan and groan over contradictions! They're not worth your time! There's a whole city out there just waiting to be discovered!

So hey you, whoever you are, your mother and father and aunties and uncles and grandfathers and grandmothers will keep telling you about the toughness of living alone. But take it from a person who has gone through 3 months of it, and is still going through it - keep your chin up, pin up that smile, take your good attitude out of the cupboard, and I assure you, you'll have the time of your life.

Sounds too easy to be true? Well, try it for yourself!

Love,
Me

pleasefindthis

2009-12-07T20:26:00.003+08:00

So I was blog hopping and stumbled across this blog.

On his/her blog description, it says:-

I need you to understand something. I wrote this for you. I wrote this for you and only you. Everyone else who reads it, doesn’t get it. They may think they get it, but they don’t. This is the sign you’ve been looking for. You were meant to read these words.

You know, sometimes, you need a special set of eyes to discover talent. But in this case, even a disabeled person, when fed with these words, would think that they were strung together by the Angel of Language.

Here are a few excerpts from his/her blog:

You told me it'd be ok. But you were the one crying.
You told me to let go. But you were the one holding onto my shirt.

You wake up with a list of all the people you'd rather be. But you're already on everyone else's list.

You should eat to fill your stomach, not your soul. And drink to numb your thirst, not your pain.

Thank you, whoever you are :) know that you're doing a great job!

OMIGOSHTHISISSOFUNNYIHAVETOPUBLICISETHIS!

2009-11-28T18:30:00.002+08:00

On FB:

Aunt: Hello J Fu luckily still not over 12 ~~~ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU AND GOD BLESSED YOU AND YOUR FAMILY

Dad: Ya still need permission to go and meet gal fren......TQ for reminding me how young I am, Haha....

Crutches

2009-11-27T01:10:00.009+08:00

Today, I saw an elderly man on crutches.

Today, I saw an elderly man on crutches, and behind him followed an elderly lady on two crutches.

They were trotting along the sidemost of the sidewalk, considerate of the faster-paced pedestrians along the way. Some may find it irritating to be held up by such slow persons, others may find it bearable. I, for one, ain't someone who can tolerate people who hog up the sidewalk and walk extra slowly.

But for this once, I made an exception.

The beauty of the scene lies in the thought of both the elderly person - in every step that the old man took before the old lady, she is reassured that the spot he had his foot on is safe for her to follow. In his mind, he is purposely taking smaller steps for her with the intention to cover more ground, all in the hope that by this, he is able to ensure that his beloved is walking on solid land.

He had one crutch, she had two. Despite the connotation of age and disability the crutches carry, in this scene, it serves as an enhancement of love through the reliance both these elderly people have on one another, forgetting their shortcomings.

On Bended Knees

2009-11-25T18:27:00.008+08:00

There are some things you get used to. Other things, you simply can't find a proper reason to understand.

Beggars ain't no uncommon sight in Malaysia. Homeless people too, for that matter. You see them all around - Petaling Street, wet markets, train stations...basically, anywhere with a good flow of people.

I was warned that London is no exception. Don't trust beggars, they say.

'There was this once I dropped a beggar a quid. Right after that, he got up and hopped into a cab!' '

Oh! There was even this one time I saw a beggar using a cell phone! And a rather recent model, for that matter!'

On my side, I never really respected beggars. I've always found them lazy. When I see a beggar, in my head, I would instantly reflect on a lecture that my dad would always repeated to us children, 'You have one brain, the person beside you has one brain as well. If that person can achieve with that one brain, you can achieve with your one brain as well.'

I thought beggars are beggars (and deserve to be beggars) because they did not bother putting any effort into things at all. Their demeanor and disposition disgusted me sometimes. Most of them who are perfectly fine, would usually be slumped against an office building with a sign saying 'Homeless. Spare change please?'.

Ugghhh...they don't even bother saying what they want! Prime example of laziness!

But one day, on the way to uni, I saw something different.

I saw a beggar, dressed in stained, black clothing with a soiled beanie over his head. He seemed perfectly fine, like most beggars in London. But one thing of him stood out - he had his kness pressed against the cold, concrete sidewalk. His body was bended with his head on the floor as well. In his hands was a Styrofoam cup, tightly held in front of his head.

Something about being in this position made things different. Being on bended knees, I know for a fact, is the most vulnerable position - with your body fully exposed to any kind of external force. Being on bended knees is painful. Being on bended knees takes effort.

Hmm...on bended knees...something to think about.

It's Almost the End of the Year

2009-11-22T03:21:00.001+08:00

And gosh, I have to say, my last year of being a teenager has been the most fulfilling year.

Ever.

...anyway

2009-11-19T01:28:00.002+08:00

(took it off Rose's blog)

“People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you’ll win some false friends and some true enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you’re honest and frank, people may cheat you. Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight. Build it anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow. Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough. Give the world the best you have anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it’s between you and God. It was never between you and them.”

(Mother Theresa)

Teach me to hold on to what I believe, and despite what other people say, continue to love You more and more simply because You are deserving of all my praise =)

I Should be Reading up on Public Law

2009-11-18T23:18:00.004+08:00

Yes! Blog revamp! Well, slightly. Not 100% Satisfied with it yet. But anyhoos...a tad a day eh?

On another note, I've just checked my webstats today, and I realised that there are quite a lot of people visiting this blog in a day!!

Problem is, I never know who you are! So it will be really really nice if you can drop a little message in the comment box or cbox. I would really wanna give a big HELLLOOOOO plus my classic smiley face =)

Oh! Had Curry chicken yesterday, not bad, I have to say =) There's a budding chef in High Holborn yo!!

My flatmate, a German, and another, an Aussie, keep telling me that I put too much effort in my food. There was this once where we had free food in the common room downstairs, and my German flatmate came up to me and said, 'Did you prepare all the food today as well?'.

They're really really nice flatmates!! A shoutout to you guys! =)

Rough Hands

2009-11-15T07:45:00.001+08:00

I'M ORDERING PIZZA TOMORROW!! I AM NOT GOING TO WASH ANOTHER DISH!!

Sorry, future husband, you're not gonna get soft hands to hold.

JOEL NG!!!

2009-11-14T18:29:00.001+08:00

Hey bro, try to get the guitar bit for your sister, can? It's a cheesy song, but the acoustics' beautiful :)

Look, Mum!

2009-11-14T04:53:00.009+08:00

I'm too lazy to explain what we had. All in all, good food, great people, awesome fun and LOTS of cleaning up =)

On tonight's menu, we have:-

Blackbean Chicken
Parsnip, Carrot and Sweet Soup
Spring Onion Omelet
Rice

Dear Jesus,

2009-11-13T19:24:00.003+08:00

Despite a gloomy day
Despite the ton of work that I have to do
Despite having to wake up at 6 in the morning to prepare for classes
Despite having to do my laundry and shopping and washing and cooking
Despite having my phone stolen
Despite the terrible cold out there
Despite spilling tomato sauce on my track pants the other day

I choose to take refuge in You
I choose to take each step knowing that You've had this in mind for me
I choose to love today despite how much I feel like hating everything around me
I choose to walk and talk and smile to reflect how much You love me
I choose to brush off the weight on my shoulders
I choose to not be afraid to fall because I know that You are there

Jesus, teach me to love and live just as you did.

=)

I choose to run without shackles on my feet

London School of Economics to read Law??

2009-11-12T08:00:00.000+08:00

(coming soon)

5 Degrees and Chicken Soup

2009-11-10T06:23:00.004+08:00

After a tiring morning of classes and lectures, an afternoon spent running around to see a friend from home, and an evening of rehearsals...ALL in a temperature of 5 degrees....!!

A hot shower and a mouth-watering bowl of chicken soup bubbling over the stove simply spells...

P-E-R-F-E-C-T =)

2009-11-09T08:33:00.003+08:00

Dear Jesus,

You wouldn't let me go, would you? :)

What is it, this time?

Funny how you send painful situations my way just to remind me of how measly I am. Funny how I find it funny. :)

Yes, I don't know what to do, again.

Only You can dig me out of this sandpit I've rather voluntarily jumped into. Yes, again.

Help me?

I don't want to keep being stupid.

Lovingly,
Me

A Typical Night

2009-11-05T18:10:00.004+08:00

Chestnut

2009-11-04T18:59:00.002+08:00

10:17:17 AM Michelle -: i can't call home using my handphone anymore

10:17:19 AM joel: mummy know d

10:17:20 AM Michelle -: or sms

10:17:24 AM Michelle -: how does she know?

10:17:30 AM joel: that time you sms her

10:17:36 AM joel: about the chestnut ring

10:18:29 AM Michelle -: chestnut???!??!!?

10:18:32 AM Michelle -: hahahahahahahahahaha!!

10:18:36 AM joel: har?

10:18:41 AM Michelle -: chastity lah

10:18:43 AM joel: chest something

10:18:44 AM Michelle -: chestnut

10:18:58 AM joel: sama sama

10:19:01 AM joel: got ch

Silly boy! So cute lah you!

Jason and Jeanine - One last breath

2009-11-02T05:26:00.001+08:00

One of em that I've been watching over and over again. :)

Nottingham Games

2009-11-01T23:49:00.021+08:00

So we we met at the Old Building in Campus at 3.30 in the morning to take a coach to Nottingham. No, that's not a picture of the bus. I just thought that it was a nice picture but didn't know where to use it. =)

We arrived at 7.30 p.m.

And WHOA! It felt so good to see Malays and Chinese and Indians speaking Manglish!

I have to say, Nottingham is a real pretty place. They have quaint, solid buildings..

Pretty, posh cars. (I just had to lah k??!)

Lush, green grass =)

And oh! How can I forget familiar faces huh?

And familiar smiles too..

Not to mention quirky ones.

So yea! We had badminton,

basketball,

netball,

football..and a whole lot more of other sports that I didn't get to take a picture of.

Got to meet our politicians. The Minister of Youth and Sports in the centre and the Director in the Ministry of Education on the right. -.-

And yes, in case you're wondering, I did make new friends. =)

What can I say? It was a rather perfect day =)

Braving Myself

2009-10-24T00:06:00.003+08:00

One thing that I've really learned and found extremely rewarding during my time in London is - braving myself.

So often at times, I find myself in situations where the only thing that is preventing my from doing something great is non other than - myself. And it's ridiculous! I never thought that I, Michelle Ng, the person everyone finds the be 'so confident' (so they say) would actually restrict herself from achieving greater heights.

The one phrase that I have been holding on to is to "NEVER be satisfied with there you're at, KEEP RAISING the bar of excellence" (it's pasted above my study table). And I've realised that raising the bar of excellence comes in line with raising myself from where I've felt most comfortable in.

I have found myself braving the fear of not meeting anyone I know in HTB Student's and just taking the tube, all alone, to a place I don't know to meet and mingle with people I have never met in my lifetime.

And I have found great people who would support me spiritually and encourage me in my walk with God.

I got myself into a position where I wasn't sure whether to go for dance class in uni or not. I was afraid that I'll meet hugely successful and technically established dancers, and I'll be left in a corner of the room to rot and catch up.

However, again, I braved myself, and found that it was the most physically and emotionally rewarding time of my life.

Running for President in Malaysia Club was one of the scariest thing I've ever done in my life. It took guts for me to say 'I nominate myself' and see if anyone would second me. It took so much for me to share what I believe and what I want to do in front of people who would judge me for what I say and a hell lot more to convince them that I have their best in mind.

I didn't get President. Got Secretary instead. The full story's rather funny, to me. Ask me for it personally if you want to hear it.

But along with Secretary follows a wave of a whole new experience for me to develop skills that I've ignored. On top of that is the opportunity to be on the Supreme Council of UKEC, an exposure which I believe will be very, very enriching.

So hey? Brave yourself. You would never know what to expect unless you do. =) Take it from me.

Ironically..

2009-10-21T04:30:00.001+08:00

I am going clubbing to network for MC. How is that possible?

I Promise to Start Work at 8

2009-10-20T02:37:00.004+08:00

WARGH!!!

I have:-

1. Legal notes to prepare for Miller's case - Criminal Class. Due next Monday

2. ILS Essay (I don't care, I'm going to do Statutory Interpretation eventhough I've done it one million kazillion times in A levels). Due week 5.

3. Obligations essay. Due week 6.

4. Read Carlil's case to Obligation's class tomorrow.

5. Go to the bank to pick up my debit card.

6. Wait another flippin' week for my pin code to arrive.

7. Pick up my mailbox key from reception

8. Request for another room card from reception. HOW IN THE WORLD DID I LOSE MY CARD IN MY ROOM I DON'T GET IT 'CAUSE HOW ELSE WOULD I HAVE CAME IN THE OTHER TIME???!!!

9. Pay tuition fees (omigoodness HSBC look what you have done to me -.-)

10. Look at what I can do with 1 and a half tubs of leftover rice, 2 pieces of chicken, lettuce, cucumbers, aubergines, sausages, eggs, yogurt, grapes by next week. Note: STOP buying too much food.

11. Print out notes for Obligations' Lecture tomorrow.

12. Remember to turn my clothes inside out before I put them in the wash.

13. Vacuum the room.

14. Not stress.

15. Buy bread.

16. Go for KCL's event tomorrow at Tiger Tiger.

17. Lock myself in the library on Wednesday.

18. Dance class Wednesday night.

19. UKEC AGM on Saturday and Sunday. Rush to church after that.

I Don't Know

2009-10-14T23:07:00.002+08:00

Day by day, my face is blown up with questions of what I am doing here in the first place.

It seemed so easy to have a motto you live by and a goal in mind before you step into the pool. But once you've jumped in, your realise that you're not as good a swimmer as you thought you were.

Don't get me wrong here. You've had lessons, you've had training sessions, you've gone for competitions. But this time, it's just entirely different.

You think you're in a pool, but you're in a sea.

Not just a sea where you can't see where your next destination is, but in a sea where torrential rain is pouring, rain that has the capacity to turn up the deepest waters. And you're in it.

Before stepping in to it, you had a preconception of what it would be like, you thought that you're prepared yourself for it.

But you never, in your wildest dreams and ability imagine that it would be that hard.

I am already in the sea.
Heck.
Bring it on.

On the Way to Lunch

2009-10-04T01:58:00.019+08:00

It was a cloudy and (very) windy afternoon in London.

Lunch was in, to me, a rather homely part of the city.

So people say that you can find anything and everything in London. Here's what the pictures have to say.

We have the greenery

the art

the crowd

the movie theaters

stage shows

quaint buildings

eye-catching adverts

lots of statues

and of course, the cafes and shops!

So people here travel in all modes.

There's, of course, the well known (and terribly expensive) London Tube.

And for people like me, walking is one of the best options.

Lunch was great.

We had smiles

a cheeky kid

and really good food

with wonderful people =)

A lovely lunch makes a night of assignments seem rather light to bear.

Cheers, ya'll!

=)

2009-09-27T23:08:00.002+08:00

Places covered over the span of yesterday and today:-

Leicester Square
China Town
Harrods
the whole stretch of Brompton Road.

=)

Ask me more about it online.

London

2009-09-25T23:28:00.003+08:00

I thought I'll never say this here but...

Gosh! Clothes in London are so cheap!! I bet Julie will love it here. 2 quids for shoes, 1.95 for shirts =), all at Primark at Oxford Street, people.

I think I'll be going for Vodafone. Nokia 5800 + unlimited text + 500 minutes + unlimited mobile internet for 25 pounds a month for 24 months. Good deal, no?

The down side of it, I'll have to wait for my debit card to clear. And that'll be around this time next week. Darn. Till then, I guess Skype and MSN will have to do. =)

So I've been sleeping at 9 and waking up at 7. London time, of course. Waking up early makes me eat extra. Yuck. The doctor says that I'm underweight but I don't believe him. Even asked if I have eating disorders -.- No worries. Worked out today. Walked everywhere as well =)

Sigh. I'm missing you.

So I'll be heading to HTB on Sunday. Quite excited =) And gosh, the whole of my next week will be packed. General Orientation, Law Faculty Orientation, tetanus jab, campus tour, uni registration, Fresher's Fayre...

Yea, I know, Jamie. I'll be making an appointment to breathe. =)

I think I'll be heading to Hyde Park for a jog tomorrow. I feel fat.

So I've promised myself a few things while I'm here. No munching on junk food, if munching is absolutely necessary, head for fruits, Michelle. Working out is essential. Once in 2 days at least. Try not to use public transport. Walk. Unless I'm late or the place I'm heading to is really really far. Stay away from dairy products. Dinner must be carb-free. Only water and juice and tea, Michelle.

Rawr. I must not come back fat. I must not come back fat.

Oh! That's right. I have to finish reading another chapter of Land Law before I sleep tonight.

Why isn't anyone online at the moment?

Hmm...I think I'll do some writing. Cheers.

I Dunnoh

2009-09-12T22:21:00.004+08:00

I find this sudden outbursts of writing rather queer. It hardly happens. And when it does, I never finish what I want to say.

So I'm leaving in 9 days.

The reality of it hasn't sunk in yet. And I'm going to take it as a good thing. I am going to leave Malaysia knowing that I lived my last week here like I've always did, just the way I like it.

Reality check, of course. It's probably going to take a while to come to terms with the fact that I won't be driving for the next 9 months, the fact that I would not have fresh clothes to wear if I don't wash them myself, or the fact that I would not wake up with breakfast on my table if I don't prepare it myself. But hey, these are things I can get used to.

I dunnoh...

People have been asking what I'll miss when I'm there, and when I say 'Everything', they go 'Ahhhhh! C'mon! Be more specific!' (Alar...if you want me to say it's you then say la!).

But truly and honestly, I'll miss everything.

Everything like...

wakingupat6inthemorningfor2Sundayservices, randomluncheswithrandompeople, thepeoplethatareclosetomyheart, almostcursingwhenidrive, makingillegalturnsandparkings, seeingdifferentlycolouredpeoplewhenwitheveryturnofahead, charkueyteowsataypanmeesushinasilemak, midvalle1utamathecurveikea, cheapmovieticketsthatihavetolineupforeverfor, hothawkerstallswithrudeauntiesandsmutshoutinguncles, drinksinplasticbagsandsquatingtoilets, currylasksasambalbelacancilipadi...

Aih...dunnoh lah.

Dear You,

2009-09-12T20:19:00.005+08:00

Do big things.

I know there have been times where people say you can't, or for that matter, there may be times where you say you can't. Let me tell you, you can.

Statistics say that a normal human can only do this and that and their limitations lies here and here and whatever, but let me pose a question to you - who told you that you are destined to be a 'normal human'? Who said that you are fit for normalcy?

People look into the past and say that certain things cannot be done by humans, that certain things should not be done by humans. But hey, who said that you are those people? You are your own person, you make the decisions you make, you do the things you do. You are not someone else. So don't let other people tell you that just because someone else can't do it, you can't as well.

There was a time in history where people believed that no man can run a 100m sprint under 10 seconds. Look at where we are today - 9.58. There was also a time where people were convinced that no man can run 5km in less than 20 minutes. Today, we have people finishing that distance in 12, 13, 14 minutes.

There will be a time in the present where people will make conclusions about the human race with what they know. But the present will be the past one day, and when it becomes the past, will you be that person who instilled hope for someone else's future? Will you set your mind on something someone said no one can ever do, and through that, challenge people to explode into the people they can be AND beyond.

People say a lot of things - circumstances are inevitable, no one can achieve the impossible, be contended with what you have. I say - circumstances are inevitable, but don't wallow in them when they work against you, pick yourself up and start again; what is impossible today will become possible one day if you decide for it to be, be thankful for what you have, never be contended with who you can become and what you can do.

Hey you, yes you =) do big things.

Be the first lady on Venus, discover a new machine, long to put the whole of India out of poverty, eliminate the need for prostitution, cure each and every disease on earth, make a 100 people smile in a day, everyday, earn your first million and spend it ALL on others...

You can do it. And when you think you can't, take courage in knowing that I believe in you. You know why?

Because great things start with people that has a heart like yours. =)

Love,

So They Say...

2009-09-07T17:14:00.002+08:00

Once bitten twice shy.

The caution that comes after being stung once in a person's lifetime can be rather overwhelming. On another note, it may not be so for some.

You try it the second time, it turns out fine. For others, it doesn't. So, for others, they've been bitten twice. Mathematically, that will mean 'twice bitten, four times shy' (there's no existing word after thrice. Interesting, no?)

So for whoever that is in the 'other(s)' category, trying the same thing another time would not be a very pleasant thing, I would think. Or the process of getting oneself to go for another attempt would take up a lot of courage, I suppose.

The damage done lasts, no?

So they say, 'once bitten, twice shy'. What if it has been three times? Four, perhaps?

Made It!

2009-08-20T16:00:00.004+08:00

All those late nights

All those trips to the library

All those extra essays

All those early mornings

All those prayers

All that hard work

All those times I passed up my work on time

All those times I brought my books to church

All the studying between services

PAID OFF =)

London, here I come!

Thank You, Jesus! =)

Dear God,

2009-08-17T18:56:00.002+08:00

Right now, I hate life.

Ok. I shouldn't sound so bitter. My bad. But I was just being honest.

God? Why must there always be an inner battle between what I want and what is good for me? God, yes, I love You. I love You truly and absolutely and throughly. And people find it idoitic that I can actually love someone I cannot see but that is the length I am willing to go for You.

But God? Sometimes I find things Your way quite frustrating. Yes, I know in my heart and my head so many things about being a Christian, but I'm just coming before You and telling You that it's one hard life to live, ok?

Yes, it is rewarding in the end. I know that for a fact. And I've been though seasons like these myself. But I'm just saying, You know, the process and the pain that I have to go through sometimes is pretty tough to handle.

Yes, yes. I know. I know I asked for it and I opened myself up to allow You to do all these. Yes God, all the prayers that I say to have You teach me. Yes God! I know that it is going to be tough! I'm just letting You know how I feel, ok?

And God? See, that's why sometimes I feel like I should just be made without feelings? Oh no no, we're not back to square one. I'm softening up, remember? Yes I know that You made emotions for us to express ourselves and to control. But I'm just telling You that it's tough.

God, I don't know. Yes, I know that love is patient. I just don't know how patient I can be. Right now, it seems like and impossible task.

Mmmm...yes, I trust You. I know You know what's best, and I love You for it. But I just hate the hurt from all the shaping that I have to waddle through now.

Just though You should know.

Love,

Got It!

2009-08-03T22:27:00.005+08:00

In continuation to my last post, I think I've finally figured things out.

See, the requirements of love as stated in Corinthians is very perfect, almost unattainable. It demands so much of a person that I dare say a person who can love so perfectly is really not human at all.

Given the fact that we are human, humans who have lots of shortcomings and are bound to make mistakes, it is rather easy to conclude that we are not perfect, and we therefore cannot love perfectly.

Why then, would the Bible teach of something so unreachable?

Well, if there were a standard to be set, that standard should be the highest. And love, being such a complex subject, must not be watered down. If not, the real essence and weight of it would be lost.

So, to correct myself, I have not not truly loved, in fact, I have. I have not loved perfectly, that's all, and that's perfectly fine because not loving perfectly does not mean that I have not truly loved.

Hmmm...things seem so much brighter now =)

Easy or Hard?

2009-07-31T15:06:00.002+08:00

Should loving someone be easy or hard?

I've been tossing this thought in my head for a long while now. And I've come to conclude that just as much as I wish that loving someone would be an entirely blissful process, it is really a mixture of both.

In the past, especially in high school, I've witnessed numerous fall outs because one party finds it painful to love. When I was younger, I used to think that it was true. I mean, why would I want to spend my entire life sleeping on a tear drenched pillow? No?

I lived by that notion for a long while. And I personally had my set of terrible experiences. Nothing that I am proud of, really. But well, just because I wasn't perfect before, it does not make talking about this subject a taboo, I'm sure.

After having my share of hell at distinguished points in my life, I grew to realise that loving is really something painful. And hey! The Bible never said that loving was an easy thing to do, right?

I look at 1st Corinthians 13 and sometimes wonder whether I have really loved. Whether in the many times I've said 'I love you' to someone, have I really been patient? Kind? Was I ever rude? Self seeking? Envious? Have I truly trusted? Hoped? Persevered? In all the days that I've claimed that I actually love someone.

I've thought about it, and to my painful realisation, I have never truly loved.

Then again, there's the whole idea about us being humans, and we fall and make mistakes. Therefore, all that matters is the intention, some claim.

Shucks. I've got myself in a corner again.

I'll get back to myself when I've had my thoughts straightened. But I don't know...loving someone seems like a scary thing to do. And honestly? At this point now, I'm afraid to love again, as ridiculous as it sounds.

=)

2009-07-24T22:41:00.002+08:00

nothing beats a perfect batch of cookies!

Sometimes

2009-07-15T00:29:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I wish that I can stop time. Not so that I can savour the moment.
It's cause, sometimes, I don't want to face what's up ahead.

Dear You,

2009-07-14T16:47:00.005+08:00

They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder. I have always opposed these kind of sayings, and tried to live the best of every moment. Yet, I gradually, (and hesitantly) come to realise that I am only human, imperfect, sadly, and subjected to the aforementioned saying.

I've been thinking of the days we spent together in the past. Save for that silly period when we were 14, I really can't recall anytime when we went through any emotional outbursts. In our defense, I'll say that we were budding teenagers. Ones that are subjected to unpreventable hormonal changes. Hence the emotional wear and tear during that period.

Yet, after the pages of letters and the painful self-conflicting hopes we had for one another, I am surprised to see us live till this day. Our days are not defined any differently. The only change, perhaps, is the extra streaks of maturity that we have witnessed in one another. The trust that we have for another another still stands, I'm sure. =) If not, why share what we did when I was at your place the last time?

I am absolutely certain that it takes a lot to be able to still read each other's minds when we're hundreds of kilometers apart. If not, how in the world would I know who gave you that Valentine's gift out of the many people in your college? No?

You are one person who is down to earth, unshaken by reality, something that I really miss. Having lived through one and a half years of absence, I am beginning to realise how precious it is to have someone who does not fight what is true - the possibilities in life that we know may or may not happen, ones that cannot be changed, except, if God wills.

Friend, I think you should know that I really appreciate those times where you've always wanted the best for me, through I've put you through hell at times. Thanks for knowing when I need my space, and embracing me when life tears down and falls apart. Hey, if you don't already know, I've always found you inspiring in your own silent way. And after living this long, may I add that it takes a lot for such influence to permeate without having the person try to do so.

I appreciate you, absolutely and thoroughly, from the deepest recesses of my heart. Writing this now, I am wishing that I could relive the moments we shared together - sleepovers, end-on-phone calls, exams, camps, performances...the list goes on, yes?

But looking ahead, deep inside, I know you're one person that I would fight to not let go. The memories we have together are too precious to be worn out by time.

Hey Ruth? Thanks. You're one in a million, and I really mean it =)

Love,
Me

Thoughts

2009-06-08T18:09:00.003+08:00

I wanted to delete my previous post about exams simply because of its disjointedness and unfinished ending. Writer's block, so they say. But after some thought, I decided not to because I figured that it would be a good way to commemorate the time I did not write cohesively.

I've been thinking quite a bit today, and I realised that I am particularly irritated with the so called 'humility' that comes with achievements and exams, especially in our Chinese culture. It is, to a large extent, terribly stupid.

I cannot understand why someone would ask how a paper went, and upon hearing that the questioned party found it rather good, comment on the extreme capacity of that person to be able to score full marks or a 'World Award', in Edexcel terms. This blowing of up sorts and the unnecessary attention that comes with it is probably why we often conjure false images of ourselves just because we do not want to 1) fail others and embarrass ourselves or 2) be the prime chatter in other people's 'coffee conversations'.

Are we deprived of the ability to sincerely accept another person's view towards a paper? Or are we just insecure when we hear of another's confidence that we find the need to balloon it until it seems almost untrue to us, and the fact that it may be untrue provides us the assurance that we may not be that bad after all?

It is all these problems that we have with our Chinese culture, or perhaps, Malaysian culture that reality is concealed and we find the need to read into situations to get some form of truth out of it. To put it in a obvious sense, plain words are worthless today.

Another thing which I am particularly irritated with is out inability, or rather, unwant to admit the talents and capabilities that we have. It is ludicrous to hear someone diminishing one's self when he/she may have obtained a winning on the international stage. Upon encouraging or mentioning about the great achievement of that person, this fella would simply brush it away with a remark that goes somewhat like, 'No la, I'm not good.'

What nonsense is this? You are capable of not only showing how good you are in the thousands of people in your school, you are capable of not only wiping out top notch people within your state without much effort, you are capable of not only competing with the top of the top in the country, but you drifted in the international arena, and wiped out the best from other countries!

There is a fine line between humility and stupidity.

I think we have embraced the latter, thinking we are really the former. Personally, I find that that is just reaffirming the latter.

Which brings me to another point, I need friends who do not blow me out of proportion or who are too 'humble'. I need friends who would either encourage me or tell me that I need improvement, I need friends who can accept compliments, I need friends who are real.

Being real. What is that, anyway?

Of Exams

2009-06-06T23:39:00.002+08:00

While it is understood that exams were once formulated to gauge a student's understanding of a certain subject, we, as humans of today, have to accept the fact that exams have morphed into something entirely different, with it's original substance trailing by a snapping thread.

Often at times, we use the excuse of what an exam 'should be' to make up for our failures or mishaps of past exams. We rant about how it has forced upon stress on students, how it accounts for the rising suicidal rates, how it has caused social disintegration and all that nonsense.

It is probably time to come to terms with the change that has happened. Exams now are considered an indication of a person's substance. And I do not find anything wrong with that. It is, whether anyone likes it or not, reflective of the person's personality. Failure, however, does not mean that the individual is a failure through and through, it is simply a sign that the person concerned is attributed in another area!

That is probably where our Malaysian education system fails. We fail to see that a student's failure in the academic arena shows that he is simply not talented in this sense, and should therefore be given the opportunity to discover another area!

Meeeehh...exams. -.-

Things to do After A Levels

2009-06-03T23:25:00.001+08:00

1. Get a motorbike license
2. Go for dance classes
3. Go for a family holiday
4. Revisit Cambodia

tbc =)

Too Guy?

2009-06-03T20:05:00.002+08:00

You know you're a too much of a guy when a guy says 'Ciao, man' upon your departure from the library, gives you a guy handshake followed by a knuckle punch =)

2-0 Baby!!

2009-05-28T18:23:00.004+08:00

"Samuel Eto'o and Lionel Messi sink Manchester United in Champions League"

~The Times

And the football hero of all time...

That's right. 5 feet 6 yo!

Perfect =)

2009-05-28T00:25:00.002+08:00

I got this from a friend's blog, who got it off someone's myspace. Whoever the author of this piece is, you're one of a kind. =)

Maybe we are suppose to meet the wrong person before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift.

Maybe the best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you’ve ever had.

Maybe it is true that we don’t know what we have got until we lose it, but it is also true that we don’t know what we have been missing until it arrives.

Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they will love you back. Don’t expect love in return; just wait for it to grow in their heart; but if it doesnt, be content it grew in yours.

Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you only have one life to live and one chance to do all the things you want to do.

Happiness lies for those who cry, those who hurt, those who have searched, and those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of the people who have touched their lives.

The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past, you can’t go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

Sigh

2009-05-27T01:05:00.002+08:00

And we all had better days. Sigh.

A Lighthearted Post

2009-05-24T16:49:00.004+08:00

I realised that my last few posts have been quite heavy or emotionally driven.

So here's my attempt to post on anything that crosses my mind at the moment...=)

I am almost 100% certain that Kris Allen's No Boundaries will be used for this year's So You Think You Can Dance America.
High foreheads are cool! Look at Sarah Wayne!

3. I love a guy with a guitar
4. James woke ME up for the first time after the many times he stayed over. Rare. Don't worry. We sleep in separate rooms. I didn't close my door last night. He saw me sleeping at 7, came in and woke me up. =)

(to be continued)

Commitment

2009-05-24T16:07:00.005+08:00

It just dawned upon me of how scary committing to a relationship it. I may get married in the next decade, people! Next decade! Omigosh!

Well, it's not that I'm not ready for commitment. But well, to a certain extent, yes, in terms of practicality. But, to a larger extent, I think the scariness of it all births from the fact that I don't want to commit just yet.

Of course, it is entirely true that being in a relationship has it's fine moments. You have security, and assurance and love and all that warm and fuzzy stuff. But...I don't know. I don't want all these just yet.

(Don't take me seriously when I say all these, this is my attempt of writing till I can reason with myself.)

Maybe I don't want to commit cause I love how things are right now. No attachments, no requirements, no consequences. I can hug any guy friend freely or allow them to stay over at my place without worrying whether my boyfriend will be jealous. I can go out for one on ones with any guy friend anytime I want without obligating myself to inform my other half of what I'm doing. I can sit with any guy in the movies, restaurant or in church without having other people to ostracize me in fear that they are intruding in my moment with my 'other half'.

Maybe I find security in all these. Maybe I am happier discovering new people, and giving them the chance to discover me as well.

Maybe I don't want to be completed with 'another half'. Maybe I want to find someone who is already complete, who already has enough confidence in himself hat he does not need me to complete him. Maybe I want that because I am that. And I cannot stand having to unceasingly reassure someone that I love him, that I still care for him, that my loyalty is towards him and him alone.

Maybe I haven't found someone that really understands me. Maybe I have yet to find someone who knows that I love being the 'guy' that I am. Maybe I need someone to know that I rather spend time modifying a car or something rather than a boring night at the movies, that I would rather go hiking than staring into each others eyes, that I would rather have him teach me a new game rather than...hmm I don't know...what do mushy couples do? Maybe I need a guy who knows what to ask and when to ask them. Maybe I need a guy whom I can stay silent with but still feel comfortable at the same time, a guy who understands that sometimes, I just love listening. (Haha! No awkward moments!) I need a guy who understands me for me.

Maybe there's no one answer as to why I feel this way. Maybe I've already mentioned the answer. Maybe the answer is all of the above!

I don't know. I really don't. But I know that I don't want to commit just yet.

Hitting a Brick Wall

2009-05-23T21:27:00.002+08:00

It has been a tiring 2 weeks.

I've been cramming book after book, file after file of notes, past year's after past year's, exercises after exercises and BAM! I can't do it anymore.

I've hit a brick wall. And I want to punch through it. But I have no energy left. I try to pump in as much as I can into whatever space that's left, but obviously, to no avail.

Every single bit of information that I scan through leaks out the very next moment.

I'm left feeling empty, useless, unproductive, worried, bogged down with thought after torturing thought of how I need this to be done, how I have to do this, how the next minute or the next second could determine my life.

I've finally come to this.
I...I can't do this on my own anymore.

Whirlwind

2009-05-14T21:21:00.002+08:00

The aircon's buzzing, my nose is stuffed, and my lips are cracking.

I lie here on my bed. Motionless. Well, physically. In my mind is a whirlwind of thoughts, questions and theories, all waiting to be validated.

I toss to my side, and stare out the window.

"Must be about 5 in the morning" I said to myself.

I curl myself into a ball, and pull my blanket up to my neck.

"God?" I murmured "I can't do this again. I don't want hurt myself again, I don't want hurt another person again. I can't. I won't. I refuse."

I stare at the ceiling and breathe a long sigh. The heat from my mouth seeps into my pillow.

Restless, I forced myself to shove the thought into the far back of my mind.

"Tomorrow's a new day. We'll take it from there."

I close my eyes, and count my the pounding of my heartbeat till I fall back asleep.

Tagged

2009-05-12T20:55:00.002+08:00

1. Besides ur lips, where is the favorite spot to get kissed?
Well, decent spots, of course.

2. How did you feel when you woke up this morning?
Shocked. Mum almost dropped a glass bottle on my head.

3. Who was the last person/people you took photo with?
Angie, Woman, Belle, Suet Wei. Last day of college.

4. Would you consider yourself spoiled?
Nawh!

5. Will you ever donate blood?
I HAVE donated blood.

6. Have you ever had a best friend who was of opposite sex?
Aha! Jeremy? =)

7. Do you want someone to be dead?
Omigosh no.

8. What does your last text message say?
"Yea, I think it's off la. Maybe another day."

9. What are you thinking right now?
Religion.

10. Do you want someone to be with you right now?
No. I'm perfectly alright.

11. What was the time you went to bed last night?
11 something?

12. Where did you buy the tee you are wearing now?
Oh I didn't buy it. My parents bought it for me. From Sabah.

13. Is someone on your mind right now?
Not anyone in particular.

14. Who was the last person(s) who text you?
Bimbo.

NINE lucky persons to do this quiz:
Errr...no need la. =)

She

2009-05-11T16:14:00.003+08:00

She refuses to think that she is plain and ordinary.

She is different, one of a kind, special, and she believes in it.

She will never believe that she is normal unless she can find someone has 'normal' as she is.

She's herself.

She is the girl who loves X-Men and Transformers.
The girl who wants to win a Nobel prize
rolls her eyes at romance but appreciates true l0ve.

She's the girl who would not cry at artificial, sappy movies, but would cry when she knows of people hurting out there, when she hears of her friend falling into sin, when she realises that there are kinds out there who do not know what chocolate is.

But, saying that, she has her soft spots.
She loves
good smelling books
adorable children
captivating scenery
being told that she is appreciated
long beach walks
and a good jog.

She is not normal. She is who she is.

Isolation

2009-05-11T16:00:00.003+08:00

Many would think that isolation is a rather abominable segment of one's life. Their argument would go along that lines of losing communication from society and failing to form sane thoughts and all that mojo. But I really beg to differ. It is sometimes in being alone that I discover who I am.

I love it when I sit in a park alone, or lie down in my room on a warm afternoon and stare at the ceiling fan. It is when I submerge myself in me, that I get to do some self searching and reality checks. Needless to say, there are many times where I find out in myself that I have morphed into a person I was not. However, these are not all bad. When I find that all these 'morphing' has caused me to grow and develop in life, (haha!) I'll keep it!

Isolation is only deemed negative when one becomes lonely. It is because in being lonely, one finds that there is something missing in life, and that may, or may not be detrimental, depending on the situation.

Hence, I do not believe that when a person goes to a movie alone, that there is something wrong in that person's life. I do not believe that walking in a mall alone has anything to do with being anti social. I believe, however, that the incapability of a person to do so would in actual fact, mean that this person has some issues to deal with.

For if you cannot be alone, you find that your confidence is not in yourself.

Old Sayings?

2009-05-06T21:49:00.003+08:00

"Decisions today may seem right today. but when you look at it tomorrow, it may be absolutely wrong. Yet, you cannot blame yourself for making the wrong choice yesterday, because yesterday, it was the right thing to do"

~Ng Jin Koon, my wise father.

"You're Very Fit Lah!"

2009-05-04T20:56:00.006+08:00

It has been a long time since I've done a post regarding my jogging experiences.

I love jogging. Funny things happen when I jog. Epiphanies too!

Anyhoos, I was feeling really lethargic today. I hate it when I have to start off the day with desk work. Tiredness seeps in like a sponge on days like these. It is funny to know that once the body is in motion, setting this motion back will cause the individual to feel exceptionally useless later on.

So, after coming back from classes, I decided to take a jog to sweat the fatigue out. I thought that I could do my usual 4k. But the heat nowadays prove to be terribly torturous to a jogger.

So I did 2.4k. No problem. Was just feeling really REALLY hot. I thought that I could not take the heat any longer, so I decided in my mind that 2.4 is enough, else I'll kill myself in this weather.

Upon ending the 2.4 stretch, I saw a rather elderly Indian man whom I have passed by several times while jogging. I did not pose much care to his presence. Until I was beside him.

He looked at me running. 'You're very fit lah!' said the man.

WOW! That really did me good. It somehow had this super power ability to encourage me to run another lap, extending the previous stretch to 3.2k.

And that got me thinking of how encouragements can do wonders, especially in such a self centered world today. That little comment probably did not take him much. Probably one breathe and a little bit of saliva. But it gave me the extra energy to make another lap despite the scorching heat I had to endure.

Imagine what an encouragement can do elsewhere? If one person can utter something positive to another just once a day, I believe that the difference that may come about would be very significant.

Then it got me thinking.

That man could have said what he said, but if I did not believe in it, his encouragement, however sincere, would be rendered worthless. If I did not believe in it, I may have been insecure, or skeptical, or cynical or doubtful, all problems we have to deal with ourselves.

Hmmm...we probably need more people to say 'You're very fit lah', and as many people to say to themselves, 'I am very fit'. =) The world would be a better place then.

Indescribable

2009-04-26T22:38:00.004+08:00

Yes, it is probably the last time that I would come home after 12 soaking in sweat, probably the last time where I would drive a bunch of noisy people back to their homes late at night, probably the last time where I'll take part in 10-table-mamak-sessions, probably the last time where I'll ever do all these back in Malaysia ever again.

There are so many things that I have learned, so many things that has happen which I would not have any other way. While I sit here and cast my sight upon the champagne bottle (which I popped too early) from the after dinner, I reminisce all the emotions that we went through, the bonds that we've built, the talents we've developed and the values that we've formed.

There were so many times where tears were shed, voices were raised, hearts were broken, pride was crushed. But amongst all these, there were even more times where laughter filled the air, where prayers were said for one another, where encouraging words never ceased, where we picked each other up, where we pushed each other on, where we were united, united for one purpose, one call, one heart.

Will I miss all these? Probably so. But I choose to set sight on what's in stored for us up ahead. In that tunnel we call the 'future', I see hearts being healed, minds being transformed, souls being changed and eyes being opened.

And when we look upon this day, we'll look upon it and smile, not because we once remembered what was 'the end', but...

'Once upon a time...'

Frus

2009-04-06T16:14:00.002+08:00

I am so frustrated!

Yesh. It's so hard to find a undergraduate scholarship that caters for Law. So angry.

Didn't get Khazanah cause they limited my co-curricular activity involvement to the past 2 years. Guess where I was at that time? -.-

I never do well with vitaes or resumes. I prefer interviews.

(murmurs under breath)

First Impressions

2009-04-04T22:09:00.003+08:00

I've been pondering about the first impressions I have given other people. Or rather, the impressions other people derive from me. Well, some of you may think that the impression I give people is ultimately what they derive from me. While that is true, it is not what I mean at all.

Look, a certain person may seem inclined to project a kind of vibe towards another. Although this certain person is inclined to do so, it may not be the intention of that person to be inclined in such a way in the first place!

And I am that very kind of person.

The first impressions that I've collected from many are as such: scary, intimidating, smart, wise, over achiever and all that kind of nonsense.

Well, for all of you who think so, don't you think the fact that I have really close friends to be ironic if I were really that scary and intimidating? Chew on it. Which sane person would want to expel all of society from himself? If you can rationally conclude that I would want to be disconnected from the people around me, well, then I am really scary and intimidating.

Wooosh. I reread my last paragraph and it seems as if I'm an angry person. I'm not at all. Don't take me as that. I'm just here to give some rationale to irrational conclusions, alright?

=)

Here. A smiley face.

Okay. Now for that wise and smart and overachiever bit, I really don't see how I am like that at all. I see the world as imperfect, and perfection is the highest status one can achieve. With that as a foundation, we as human beings are always striving to be better, and the only reason to keep striving towards what is better is because we are imperfect and wish to be perfect. Hence, there is no such thing as being the 'smartest' or the 'wisest' unless you are limiting your comparison to a selected few.

But don't you find that rather controversial? Basing my argument on what I have established, what is smart? What is wise? What do you mean by being an overachiever? Where is the benchmark? Who forms this benchmark? What authority does this person or people have to set a benchmark in the first place?

Now, looking at how I look at the world, you should be able to see that I don't believe in a person being wise or smart. I believe in a person being wiser and smarter, though. But I'm not implying that I am above anyone else here. For in being able to do so, I have to be of a certain level which people approve of. And I am sure that I have no achieved that status.

We, meaning I included, have way too much to learn. Therefore, it is not even safe to conclude that anyone is wise or smart in the first place.

Gah

2009-04-04T21:38:00.002+08:00

I hate my style of writing. It should be one of my resolutions to consciously discover new means of portraying myself through words.

Every time I look back at the pieces I've written, I get this strong sense of disjointedness from it's overall structure.

Well, I can argue and say that this very portrayal is a reflection of how I feel at my time of writing. But I still feel that it's not a solid reason to fall back on.

Flaws are flaws. My inabilities cannot be used as a reason to draw myself into too much comfort.

It's ironic, you know. At that point where I'm forming my thoughts, it seems as if everything is smooth sailing and what I have in mind is conveyed very clearly. Until I take a second read at it.

There are times where I go, 'OMIGOODNESS! Is this really me?' really loud (in my head). But it's worse when I have this kind of reaction at an extremely pivotal moment where 'disjointedness' would only prove to be my huge downfall.

It's time to tighten your belt, Michelle. *breathes in*

Ramblings

2009-04-01T22:01:00.003+08:00

So I've obeyed (or rather succumbed) to my father's nagging and applied for accommodation in LSE.

God willing, when (gosh it's so hard for me to use that word!! But stay positive, Michelle!) I get my results to get into LSE, I would be leaving in a mere 4 months time. Yes, fast, I know. Even I wonder at times of when did all the hours fly past.

I'll be ecstatic, of course. Who wouldn't be if he or she had the opportunity to live a life long dream?

But, what about the people I'll be leaving behind? My friends, family and acquaintances.
Who have I impacted?
How have I impacted them?
Are these impacts good or bad?
What about my ministry?
What have I done for it?
Is it sufficient to see them stand alone when they have no one to lean on?
How will people remember me?
Who will the know me as? Just a church girl? Just the study-freak in class?
What legacy have I left behind?
Am I even worth remembering?

Questions. Important questions, I may add. All left for thought. Some already answered. Some answers are left to strive for. Some stand to be corrected. Some should stay as they are.

Sigh...God?

John

2009-03-31T23:08:00.005+08:00

I know of a boy named John,
Wherever he went he shone.
John is a boy
Who looks like a toy,
But a toy he is surely not.

In the kitchen John was, one day,
He stood on a stool and said,
"Where are the cookies
and also that sushi
That mummy would not me have?"

So John tip toed on his stool
And found the jar, he drooled.
The jar with the cookies,
And the one with the sushi,
He grabbed them down and shmooed.

Now John knew that all these food,
Can be really good food.
Sushi's healthy for the body,
Cookies get you all oddy,
And they taste so good when chewed.

Then John bit a cookie,
And later a sushi,
And felt it melt in his mouth.
It tasted so good, so with a hurry,
John bit and crunched and chewed.

He kept doing so,
But little did he know,
That the food was storing up in his mouth.
Still, John kept biting and chewing and crunching and munching,
Till there was no space is his mouth.

Now John can't spit the food out,
Else mummy will find out.
But John can't chew
Because there is really no room!

But John tried and waited for it to melt,
Well it did, but it rendered no help,
Much later than sooner,
John found some space in the corner,
And worked his way through the stuff.

John tried to bite and chew,
But it made him feel like a fool.
His mouth became sore,
As if his tongue had tore,
In his attempt to store.

Now John is tired,
He tears as he wishes,
That he did not eat more than he need.
Cause now it's starting to hurt,
'Pain' is the word,
Oh! I wish I only had some curd!

But looking at where he is,
There's two ways this can lead.
Either John gets real healthy,
or he becomes all sickly.

Inside him, John wishes to stay healthy,
For being sickly is not the best to be.

I Once

2009-03-27T08:54:00.002+08:00

I once remembered a place less than it is.
Less hectic for sure.
Before I understood,
Time bore no bounds.
Till, I did.

I once remembered a place more than it is.
It was fresher,
brighter,
...less real.

But it was where I once remembered that
Everything was possible.
Orange trees in tropical forests,
Snow falling on the hemisphere,
Jingles on the roof on Christmas eve.

I once remembered
smiling more
laughing more
playing more
and falling even more.

Sometimes, I wished I did not fall.
For in falling, I am.
And in I am, I once remembered.

Paroimia

2009-03-25T21:02:00.004+08:00

(Click to enlarge)

Not to be missed!

Reason 1: It's by youths for youths (and everyone in and around this age circle)!
Reason 2: It's thought provoking!
Reason 3: There's good food involved! (smacks lips!)
Reason 4: Awesome music, dancing, lighting and acting!
Reason 5: I'll be in it!

=)
Miss it? DON'T!

Quote

2009-03-04T23:41:00.003+08:00

"The song is playing all round us all the time, the song is playing everywhere, it's written on our hearts, and everybody is playing the song. See, the question, the question is not whether or not you are playing the song , the question is - Are you in tuned?...Some people know all sorts of stuff about music, they know about pitch and modes and keys and instruments, so they can hear things that maybe other people don't. They can hear subtlety and neurons in the notes that other people might miss, they appreciate things other people might miss, but it's also possible to be so caught up in the technical aspects of the song that you miss the simple pure enjoyment of the song..."

~Nooma, Breathe, Rob Bell.

HELP College Teaches Patience

2009-03-04T17:13:00.009+08:00

So class finished at about 4 today. A few of us took off in Alex's car to the Main Block where our cars were. Upon reaching there, we realised that the rush hour has already started.

Wow whee. Such fun! (in sarcastic tone)

So I headed to my car and surveyed the parking lot. As usual, it seems that HELP students don't know how to cut into another line when they have the right of way. So I decided to take the line that need no cutting and the one that was ACTUALLY MOVING.

That was a big mistake. Little did I know, my evaluation was flawed. And a terribly long line was awaiting me. Exhibit A:-

Now, I was in the car for an extremely long time already, so I decided to be productive and do some work!

Law notes!!

I was going home to do it anyway, and in this jam, why not? So i pulled up my hand brake, adjusted my chair to a comfortable position and started copying!!

Now, traffic STARTED to move...and by the time I got out of college, it was already...

YEAP. 4.33 p.m. 33. minutes in the car park. If it were not for the jam, I would have reached home in 8 minutes. Which would have made it 4.08 p.m. instead of 4.33 p.m. Exhibit B:-

Ish...HELP carpark -.-

The Boy in the Stripped Pajamas

2009-03-03T22:32:00.004+08:00

Amazingly moving. Not for the faint of heart.

So real, so blunt, almost realistic.

The acting was superb, considering the amount of emotion each character had to portray. The ending, perfect. Even the colours of the movie blended so well with the dull, gloomy atmosphere. The make up, the costume, the setting were thought of to the minor-most detail.

Of course, the plot is unconventional. But worth every bit of watching. It's superb how they manage to blend innocence and brutality, insanity and serenity, pain and beauty, love and hate, all into one show. It blends politics and history, fame and defamation, pride and it's downfall with right proportions, thus producing a piece of the painful, undeniable past we all wished never were.

For those historical movie junkies like me, this is a must for you.

In simple terms, if you loved Changeling, you'll love this.

God Allowing Satan to Tempt Job?

2009-03-03T20:50:00.003+08:00

We had a discussion about this in Lit class today. I found it hard to explain. Someone said that technically, God didn't tempt Job but Satan did. Others said that the permission granted by God means that it really is God who tempted Job. But here's what Christian Apologetics has to say:-

Job 1:1 and Job 1:12

(Job 1:1) - "There was a man in the land of Uz, whose name was Job, and that man was blameless, upright, fearing God, and turning away from evil."

(Job 1:12) - "Then the Lord said to Satan, "Behold, all that he has is in your power, only do not put forth your hand on him."

When the Bible says that Job was blameless, it does not mean that he was absolutely sinless. It means that he was a God-fearing man who sought to do what was right before the Lord. Job's awareness of his own sins is acknowledged by the fact that he sacrificed animals to the Lord as atonement for his sins in chapter 1.

As the story goes, the "sons of God", angels, presented themselves before God. Satan was there and a conversation ensued about Job's goodness. Satan challenges God by stating that Job will denounce God if afflicted. God gives permission to Satan to afflict Job. Of course, Job doesn't denounce God. So, the question is why would God allow Satan to do this?

The reason is so that God may be vindicated at His word and so that we might understand that trials and tribulations will come to those who are godly. In the former, we see the righteousness of God After all, none are righteous before God (Rom. 3:10-12). In the latter we see the perfection of Job's faith (James 1:2-4).

In the Bible, it also says that God cannot tempt. Temptation is only of the devil. James 1:13 says:-

¹³When tempted, no one should say, "God is tempting me." For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone;

The Bible never contradicts. If not God inspired, it must not be interpreted in any other manner. For all scripture is God breathed.

Michelle's Thoughts

2009-03-03T20:09:00.006+08:00

Every wondered why divine creation oozes all things that are good and even has the ability to change bad to good, while human creation provides pros and cons all the time? Never once were we capable of creating something without the expense of another.

My whole time of studying the humanities proved realisation as such. When we study economics, there are always arguments for and arguments against. In Law, there are always agreements that stems from the benefit of a certain legal institution and disagreements because of it's loop holes. In Literature, we realise that there's no one way to construct an argument.

And these are all human systems, philosophies and thoughts. We always work around pros and cons.

Take a simple car for instance. It boosts the economy as workers are able to get to destinations faster, it provides relaxation while traveling, it helps us reserve energy for when it is needed, it helps us to connect the world into a tighter circle and benefits of that sort. But it also pollutes the air, creates traffic, increases stress during traffic jams, depletes natural resources and so on. It almost seems as if anything good that comes out of out innovation is canceled off by something bad.

But divine creation does the opposite. Take a tree for example. It keeps soil in place, soothes the eye, provides shade, cools the air, provides food, it serves as a home for many species and turns carbon dioxide (something not beneficial to humankind) into oxygen (something we need!). I can't even think of any harm that a tree can do! I may be biased now but, I challenge you, think about it! To me it just seems as if trees are always there to our rescue. Where there is soil erosion we plant trees. Where a landscape is just bare and ugly we plant trees. Where there is too much pollution we plant trees. Where our eyes hurt, we look out to the trees. =)

You know, we humans strive to be perfect. And we have been striving since time began. But still, the fact that technology keeps improving proves that there will never be a time where we will fulfill our wanted and needed desires. We have over a thousand years' worth of history and we've only advanced that much. But we're still so blinded to the fact that we are imperfect. That the strife before and the strife in the future would always be present because we are forever imperfect.

We're human. That's all we'll ever be, that's all we would be.

Or do you really think so? Is there a possibility where we could attain more that what society has set? But how?

Untitled

2009-02-24T11:41:00.003+08:00

Tainted logs of passing spring,
Left abandoned, undone.

The soul yearns, longs, wishes...
To be left unburdened. But how?

With many chains that traps our
being,
We sometimes long to have
nothing.

Nothing to care for,
Nothing such as this, that,
or...

Nothing.

But, nothing?
Really?

Voice of Truth

2009-02-16T22:14:00.003+08:00

Oh,what I would do to have
the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand

But the waves are calling out my name
and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win,
you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

Oh, what I would do
to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant
with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound
of a thousand warriors
shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

But the giant's calling out
my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me
time and time again
"Boy you'll never win,
you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

But the stone was just the right size
to put the giant on the ground
and the waves they don't seem so high
from on top of them looking down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
when I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
singing over me

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says "do not be afraid"
And the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe (I will choose to listen and believe)
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

I will listen and believe
I will listen and believe the voice of truth
I will listen and believe
'Cause Jesus you are the voice of truth
And I will listen to you.. oh you are

~Casting Crowns

Thoughts

2009-02-16T17:20:00.003+08:00

A friend of mine mentioned about how his brother's girlfriend of one or two years just broke up.

What he said and did after really spoke to me. He placed the index finger of each hand together and swiftly separated it while saying:-

This goes to show that even a close relationship can be so fragile.

Right then and there, I was reminded of how in a relationship, two is really not enough. In actual fact, we really need three to complete the bond. No no, don't get me wrong here, I'm not encouraging trinogamy or anything of that sort. Hear me out.

In the world today, or even the days before, two people who are involved in a boy-girl relationship (fondly known as BGR) only restrict it to simply a boy-girl relationship. They make decisions together, go through life together, do things together and what not. While that is all fine and dandy, it is the blindness in such relationships that causes destruction to blossom from within.

See, many know the phrase "Love is blind", and that is in fact, utterly true. I have seen guys who would go to the ends of the earth just to send an MMS on a girl's birthday. He would not only buy the MMS, but upon realising that his phone has a technical problem, he would drive all the way from PJ to KLCC just to get it fixed. That really speaks volumes. Think of the traffic congestion he has to go through, the terribly expensive parking he has to pay, the time spent just for that and the energy used in the process. All for one birthday MMS.

Now, this happens when one party is blinded. Imagine two! The horror! While it is true that many do turn out well with each other alone, I believe that it is, to a large extent, successful upon the many guidance and confiding that the turn out is such.

This is what the Bible has to say about this:-

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three is not easily broken.
~Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NIV)

Earliest man determined that twisting fibres together and forming a small bundle, made the 'rope' stronger yet easy to manoeuvre and splice. Simply using one strand or fiber provided virtually no strength, two fibres added more but three strands twisted together in different directions - called plaiting or braiding, proved to be much more than three times stronger than the single strand.

It is interesting to note that increasing the number of strands above three (for any given diameter) does not significantly or proportionally increase the strength of the rope. Traditional rope making involved braiding three or more three-stranded cords in order to make an even stronger rope.

A strong relationship, whether a friendship, a boy-girl relationship, a parent-child relationship, needs God in between to ensure that it is safe, to ensure that it grows, to ensure that it benefits, to ensure that holy values are cultivated and to ensure that love would blossom.

Certain excerpts from this post was taken from Three Cord Ministries

Passion

2009-02-08T23:39:00.006+08:00

My God is passionate about all things good. And this includes justice.

A few of us met up today. Carmen, Pris, Randy, Lynn and I. My mum calls us the Legal Eagles. It was just, amazing.

We sat and shared our hearts on the social and legal injustice in Malaysia. All of us have some form of interest or, are already rooted in that field. Randy's a 2nd year Law student, Lynn interned in the International Justice Mission, Carmen's studying Business and Psychology but has a great interest in politics, I am going to study Law soon, and Pris was the one who introduced Lynn to the group.

It's great to know that I am not the only one that feels the same about our political system in Malaysia. Our older generation has gone through so much until it has came to a stage where they are tired of what is happening in the country. I have to say that it is sad to see that people are choosing to sit and do nothing, or worse, leave the country because they see that there is utterly no hope for Malaysia.

On the contrary, I think otherwise. The fact that there is so much corruption does not give us an excuse to flee. Moreover, it really gives us another reason to be more involved in this area where these problems should be addressed. I believe that God allowed us to be born in Malaysia for a reason, and unless He calls you to migrate, there should not be a reason for you to do so because, in any context or another, I dare say that a decision to move out of this country is due to personal, and selfish reasons.

You know, we talk so much about how corrupted our government is and how torn apart the justice system is in Malaysia. We get angry and emotional over it, only to bring the conversation to nothing. I really believe that all these talk without action is sheer complain, and if you don't intend to do something about it, don't complain. But, don't take this the wrong way. By all means, discuss, edify, educate. But don't complain.

Lynn mention about persistence. And I am so sure that many Christians in the legal and political field who had the same vision as the few of us have find it tough to 'survive', in that sense, with their desires for the country. We have great dreams, wonderful dreams that are all good and beneficial. But the one thing that we should really ask ourselves is, 'Are we really aligning ourselves to the vision God has for this country or the vision that we have for this country?'. Our vision may be good but it may be, for this moment in time, contrary to what God has in mind. So when we fight our battles, we are really fighting a losing battle because that is not what God has for our country in the first place!

Strength comes from God. Persistence is never easy especially when you're feeling the opposing current of so many people who don't believe in you or hate what you're doing for that matter.

But God is truth, align yourself with truth, and the truth will set us free.

Blessed

2009-02-07T22:20:00.004+08:00

Click to enlarge

4 out of 5 university offers? Thank You, God. I'm so so blessed.

Never in a million yeas would I think that I can get into such great universities. It's really a dream come true =) And I could only have done it because You are amazing.

Thank You. So, SO MUCH.

Tagged

2009-02-06T23:05:00.006+08:00

DIRECTIONS:

Once you've been tagged, you have to list down 16 random things, habits or goals about you. At last, choose five people to be tagged, listing their names, and why you chose them.

1. In my lifetime, I would love to personally build a radio-alarm clock, a telescope and an English Ship Model set in the 1500s. Yeap, call me a guy. But I really love these kinda things.

2. There was one point in my life where I didn't have a favourite colour. Now, I fancy bright reds, yellows and oranges. Queer, huh?

3. When I was a kid, my head was too heavy for my body. I wouldn't be able to walk straight because it will throw my balance off. Walking down the stairs was never pleasant, of course.

4. I have this craving to start playing CS, Dota or L4D.

5. Believe it or not, in my whole lifetime, I never had a crush on a celebrity. Yea, I'm a girl right? And most girls will usually have one celebrity crush. Wait. Shucks. I love Jamie Oliver. Not cause he's good looking, but it's cause of his cooking, and his passion for it. Dang it! And I thought I had a record.

6. I am not smart. I just practice and work on my flaws a lot. So when it comes to the crux of the situation, I seem as if I'm smart, when I'm really not all that.

7. I love certain scents. Like...Money, lemon, orange, cinnamon, peppermint, beach water, new books, mum's home cooked food =)

8. I get extremely excited when I watch good dance choreography and technicality. It's almost embarrassing cause I will speak really really loudly. Not cool.

9. My greatest dream, and prayerfully, a goal which I can accomplish, is to alter Malaysia's Federal Constitution. Don't give me that look. Yes, I know what I'm getting myself into.

10. I'm allergic to tea tree oil. There was this once where I applied it, and my face was flaring red.

11. I have a soft spot for salespeople. Especially those that requires bargaining. I can't seem to help wondering whether I'm causing damage to their lives by ripping off their profit.

12. There's this part of me that would love to bungee jump, sky dive, quad bike and go tubing on blades on day.

13. I love studying constellations. lying back and drawing them out is the best thing to do on a dark, breezy night.

14. When I am in UK, I would want to work in a dance studio, a sushi parlor and a Malaysian restaurant.

15. I would want to have a library of books one day.

16. I love to listen more than I love talking.

Hiking

2009-01-31T20:48:00.003+08:00

So on Thursday, Jer, Berns, Ming, Levina and I decided to head to Bukit Gasing for a hike.

See, thing is, Jeremy is in the Boy's Brigade, Ming's a scout. Levina, Ming, Jer and I have all came here before. But...we decided to be adventurous.

After stretching, we headed in, only to find out that some reconstruction has been done to the place. Fine and well enough. The old paths were still there, so it was ok. Anyway, we trekked straight into the jungle. No sweat here at all.

Until we came to a Y-junction. And Jer goes, 'Which path do you guys want to take? The river path or the one up the tower?'. Being the decisive people we are, we answered, 'Anything lah...'. So the river path it was! (Since it's the river, and it sounds more adventurous. Like, you can say, 'I trekked by the river, kinda thing). BUT! Yes, the big but. None of us have been through this path before.

Great, guys. We have a partially updated GPS map in Ming's phone and a digital compass. Wonderful eh?

So we walked...and walked...AND WALKED. And I said, 'Ming, in the car, you said that you use this road to go to Josh Chew's place a lot, right? Why don't you lead the way?'. Ming replied, 'Okay.' And headed to the front of the line.

Right, so all this while, we felt quite safe, right? Since someone who knew the way was leading the line? Haha...Read on.

After a while more, Michelle asks again, 'Ming? Do you know where we're going?'. Ming said, 'Uh, no actually'. 'WHAT??!!' went the whole group. 'I haven't been this way before!'. (laughs) great, just great, guys. So we walked a bit more, and Michelle says, 'Uh...guys? Haven't we been here before?'. Bernard said, 'Don't be silly lah!'. And Levina said, 'MEEEECHEELLE!!!!'. (hits someone). The other two shrugged, and moved on.

So we decided to keep walking until we find a proper path. And we did! (after a very long time) Hooray!! Human path! By now, we can see the rain coming. It was dark...and whooo...the wind was blowing.

While walking on the human path, we suddenly realised that the path was really getting smaller and smaller. Not a good sign, right?? Further up, we saw that ferns started to criss cross along our way and sharp trees were appearing quite frequently. Thus indicating that this path was not well travelled. GREAT.

Levina was in front of the line, now. Suddenly, 'AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!'. Everyone turns, 'What happened?' 'What happened?'. "How am I going to get down this thing?!' She says. Ming the comes to the rescue, 'Aiya can lah!' Bernard, 'Can or not? do you need help?'. Ming replied, 'Can can, no problem.' Lo and behold, my fellow readers, there was this 6 feet deep hole that was in our way. Dropping in and twisting an ankle isn't really a good idea, I'm sure.

So we were getting quite worried by now. Finally, Ming saw this squared piece of paper. 'Yes! someone has been through here before!'. Another few steps, a 100 Plus bottle!!. 'Yes! We're safe!' said Berns.

About a while more, Bernard then went, 'Guys, I hear cars, we are alright? Very near already!'. Here, everyone stops to listen. 'Oh yea! I hear it!' Michelle says. So we kept trekking and talking. Having a really fun time, basically. And then Ming says, 'Guys! I see a roof!'. 'Oh really' said one of us. 'Yea! It's just up ahead!'.

A Malay man was at the foot of the hill. We exchanged our 'Selamat petang-s' and asked him for directions back to our cars. This man said that a walk back to Bukit Gasing will take really long as compared to going go Pantai Dalam, which was 20 minutes away. So we agreed to go to Pantai Dalam and see what we can do there.

Along the way, we almost went up a temple, circled a football field in mistake of a shortcut, saw a Muslim cemetery, and passed by a really old, scary lady. At the end of the road, we saw a highway. (LIKE FINALLY, RIGHT?) and guess what read at the bottom of the highway?

Bangsar
Pusat Bandaraya

At this point, we were really laughing our heads off and couldn't help but to take a picture. We really didn't know where we were, and so Bernard decided to walk up the overhead bridge to figure out the direction of the highway, cause it might just tell us where we are right. He did so, and came with the following results, 'Guys, this road goes to Subang Jaya'. (insert laugh here). And then Jer looks to the right and says, 'Eh guys, look! Pearl Point!' (insert laugh again).

So we circled the highway, and found ourselves at the commuter station. This whole time, we were deciding whether to take a bus, a cab or a train. And Bernard orders a Ramly Burger. Yeap, you got that right. A Ramly Burger. When we are lost in some weird Malay settlement where they stare you down for wearing board shorts.

FINALLY. We got a cab. Paid 10 bucks cause of overloading and got back to our cars.

Authors note: This story is as true as how false it sounds.

Of Exams and Divine Blessing

2009-01-26T22:30:00.005+08:00

So I had my last paper today. Economics. It was a pretty OK paper. Lots of drama involved, though.

See, I finished my paper 15 minutes earlier, which is a huge plus point because the time allocated for this paper is really tight. So I spent the first 12 minutes sprucing up my answers, neatening my graphs and things as such. I was really proud with myself, really. Didn't know that I can finish it in such a time frame.

BUT!!! *pride bubble pops here*

When I turned the booklet over, to my horror, there was a 9 mark question!!

Wait. Let me explain.

I am not the kind of person that does this a lot. The spacing of the paper was as such:-

penultimate page of exam booklet

See, usually, the long essay-more-than-10-marks question will be the last, so looking at this page and the usual structure of the past year exam papers, it would be instinct for us to think that this is the last page, right?

WRONG!

This was what was at the cover of the exam booklet:-

RAWR!! And I discovered it's existence in the last 3 minutes!!

THANK THE ALMIGHTY GOD that I manage to finish it within that time frame. Answers were really short but substantial (I hope X] ).

*breathes* God has been good throughout this exam period =)

The Simplest Things in Life..

2009-01-20T22:26:00.007+08:00

Brings about the greatest joy.

I would rather spend the night with you guys in a park, on the swings, savouring on Ramly burgers than sitting in a corner while watching people gamble their money away.

I would rather spend New Year's Eve by the pool with a bunch of great friends while talking and sipping 100 plus than with sweaty, vulgar people somewhere in the heart of KL.

I would rather be dancing in the dance room with you all than dancing at some wild party.

I learned, through people like you, how amazing life can be without challenging danger. And for that, I am ever grateful =)

Oh...and I got LSE =) And Jamie kissed me.

=)

2009-01-15T23:29:00.002+08:00

It's 11.30 at night

I have an exam paper tomorrow.

And I've just finished a game of passing with my brother.

=)

I'm thankful. It's because of You that I can feel this way.

Assuaged

2009-01-14T14:17:00.004+08:00

My head weighs heavily against my neck. And it has only been an hour of math.

I walk around aimlessly, allowing my body to be magnestised to whatever it wishes. With that, I found myself folded on the sofa beside the window.

I grabbed the silky green pillow by my side, and rested my head on it.

For once in a long while, I feel comfort. There's no noise around me. All I can feel is the uneven, but yet, soft texture of the sofa and the sun's golden hue upon my skin. The fan isn't on. But the breeze that comes about weaves in a tangible tone of naturality. I close my eyes, and take in all that dances in my presence.

Soon, birds start to sing, all in different tones and different rhythms. I can hear the soft spoken ones whispering a constant beat at the background. The bright, outstanding ones are humming a soothing tune. All this while, I hear an orchestra of communication. Birds all around my neighbourhood are singing words to one another. Words that they can chant out loud and not bother about secrecy. There's confidence in every note they sing. The kind of confidence that can scarcely be found in my society today.

I rest in this shade of nature for a while longer. Undisturbed.

=)

2009-01-12T21:03:00.001+08:00

I GOT A CONDITIONAL OFFER TO THE UNIVERSITY OF WARWICK!!

Josaw? Meet you there? =)

A Chapter of Learning

2009-01-07T15:28:00.003+08:00

You know how we always presume a situation to be? Especially in our teenage years where gossip is paramount and drama, inevitable.

When we listen someone talk about a certain something that has a certain relation to us, we take it in as a direct reference without giving it a second thought. From there, emotions are built up (absolutely unnecessary ones, I may add) and presumptions are formed. Being human, that is how we are, right? But it doesn't mean that it should be.

I have learned that these kind of situations can be throughly prevented if one chooses to insert wisdom and maturity into the picture. And by far, the best solution to these kinds of mess ups will be direct confrontation, instant direct confrontation, that is.

As hard or as mortifying as it may be to face up to the reality of the cirtumstance, I have learned that it is absolutely necessary for it to be done rather than leaving it to bloom and blossom in the wrong direction. But why instant direct confrontation? Well, I have also realised that all these emotional built up can be given an immediate halt if one chooses to clear up the situation immediately. With that, energy and time can be saved. No?

It's time to grow up, people. =)

Happy New Year =)

2009-01-02T13:13:00.003+08:00

2008

It was an amazing year. As expected, it was no less than a thrilling roller coaster ride - emotionally, physically and mentally.

This was a year where I am permissible to do loads of things. I no longer had to sneak myself into 18 and above movies, I no longer had to duck myself in a corner when I was offered some wine. But, with this, I no longer had my parent's full shoulder to rest on, I no longer posses an extra crutch to hold me up, I had to learn to stand on my own two feet.

Looking back, I would not say that I wouldn't change certain things. There are many things I wished I didn't do or say, things that I can't change, things that will simply be a part of my life for a terribly long time. For once, I'm looking back and wishing that I could change something. It will probably take a long while before I can come to fully realise and accept that it has became a part of me.

But oh well, life waits for no man, right?

Entering college was tough for me. I was, as said before, entering a zone where I had to start a fresh. I had no one with me in class, that is. No one who knew my past, no one who knew my character, no one who knew my achievements. But along the way, I can confidently say that God has been great in sending amazing people to pull me through this year. They have been there for me to share my ups and downs, and for me to share theirs as well. They taught me lots, and kneaded me into the changed person I am today.

There were many events that came and passed along the way. One of which would undoubtedly be Live.Revolution. It was an amazing camp. Different, yes. But amazing. From that point on, I could see lives taking a total change, and I'm glad that I had a part in this. I learned a lot, and went through a lot. Quarrels, misunderstandings, relisations, patching ups, soul searching...But it was all worth it.

Oh! How can I forget the time when I was diagnosed with having slipped discs in June? That was a tough period, knowing that I would be carrying this with me for the rest of my life. The pain, I remember, was excruciating. I couldn't do lots of things that I was able to do before. But I know that there's a bigger picture to this, and I'm smiling because I know that I'm in the process of discovering what it is.

2009

With a university acceptance under my belt just before I usher in the new year, I can finally say that life would take a whole different toll on me.There are many probable situations at hand. I may or may not make the grades, I may or may not leave for the UK, I may or may not get to where I want to be...

But even with these doubts, I know one thing remains standing. I know that I have an amazing God who wants nothing less that the best for me. I know that He'll see me through situations and would never cease His process of teaching and moulding me.

On top of that, I would not be having that irritating female voice in my room anymore, or perhaps, just for a long duration. Yep. My sister would be going to DTS, and would then come back, only to prepare to leave for Nilai College. That means no one to shout at, no one to blame when the room is messy, no one to take sanitary pads for me when the stash in the toilet runs out, no one to run around for me...But, again, life waits for no one, right? =)

It's going to be a great year - I would finish my probational driving period, I would, by God's grace, perform in April, I would make the grades, I would head to UK, I would discover new things about myself, I would change lives, I would leave a legacy behind.

I would, because I know.

(insert scream here)

2008-12-30T12:47:00.005+08:00

Upon hearing my phone alarm ring at 9 a.m. in the morning, I grappled along the shelf beside my bed in search of that nuisance of a machine, only to find it dancing beside my bed.

"Mmmmpppphh...." I groaned, and brushed my finger along the "off" button. My eyes tried it's very best to lift the weight of late nights off, but rendered to no avail. No less than 30 seconds after the alert of my mechanical rooster, I dozed off again.

10.48 a.m.. Shucks.

While releasing a yawn and allowing my eyelids to prance the grogginess off, I hastily dragged myself out of my nest and into the washroom where I performed the usual. With that, I grabbed Frankiebaby off the shelf and rushed down to the dining for some tea.

I have proven to myself that I posses short attention span when it comes to the classics. It is only with shifting locations and reading positions that I elongate my ability to drink in the rather endless strings of words.

Within a duration of an hour, I shifted myself from the dining, to the sofa beside the computer, and now to the couch beside the window in the loving room. Gah.

"Michelle! Mail for you form Kings!!" cried my mother.

Must be some confirmation mail or something, I whispered to myself.

Mum stuffed the mail through the window. Gosh, this is a thick one, could it be....? At this point, my hands are shaking profusely.

I glanced at the top of the envelope. "Royal Mail" it said. I was screaming inside. Whether in fear or with excitement, I don't know. Probably a mixture of both. I carelessly ripped the mouth of the mail, and stripped the contents off its skin.

Dear Miss Ng

I am pleased to inform you that your application to King's College London has been favourably considered and UCAS has been instructed to make you an offer on the course shown below subject to the specified conditions...

(insert scream here) THANK YOU, GOD!!

Peeves

2008-12-29T22:21:00.002+08:00

There are a few things I can't tolerate. One would stem from a situation as such:-

"Oooohh! So when's your performance ar?"
"Somewhere in April (insert smile)"
"Oooohh! And what will you be doing in this production?"
"I'll be choreographing"
"WAH! Choreographer! You must be very good right? You don't look like the dancing type anyway! Must come watch you!!"

Thing is, I don't mind when such an expression is displayed when I tell a person of my upcoming performance. It's normal, and forgivable, I suppose, considering the fact that I do not look like a person who would dance at first glance.

Hey, thick-black-framed glasses with a weird bod. I don't blame you.

But it gets irritating when the same person keeps asking time and time again with the same questions. Especially the choreographer part (followed by hard pats on the shoulder).

I don't know what message the phrase contains. Do you expect something from me? Is being a choreographer such a new thing to you? Or is it because you don't expect such a thing out of me, thus the expression? Or is there another hidden meaning behind it? Probably one that goes, "she must be an outright liar...(grins inside)".

Whatever it is, yes, people of the world, Michelle Ng dances. Whatever your opinion, if it's not constructive, keep it to yourself. I choreograph. And you choreograph too, believe it or not.

Dare you say that you don't? Alright. What about that time you stroke a dumb move in class? Or that time you were screaming to your favourite song in your locked room? Or that time in the bathroom? You danced. You made it your own. You created that DANCE. It's called choreographing.

So, what makes you so different from me?

Alone?

2008-12-22T20:30:00.003+08:00

I have always been a position where I am forced to start anew. To redevelop my social life. That goes from making new friends, to creating close bonds, to accepting the fact that I have no one to depend on but myself.

The transition I had from primary school to secondary school was tough. I wanted to enroll myself into Chung Hwa Independent, just cause I knew who was going there. I guess I found security in familiarity - knowing that I have some form of history with someone.

Mum lectured me. Real hard. It was along the lines of making new friends and how this is a norm in life - that everyone has to go through it.

Well, mum was right.

College came. And the same situation happened again. I was left rather alone. Classes were hard to enter. I wouldn't know who to sit with, who to talk to, what to talk about, what they'd think of me...yaddi-da-da...

But looking back. Everything worked out. Again.

This makes me wonder - how would I feel about UK? If I even get in, that is.

Presents?

2008-12-17T09:33:00.002+08:00

I love giving presents. I love receiving presents too! (who doesn't?). But here are a few pet peeves I have about presents, or getting presents.

In out ever expensive society of today, getting a present ain't that cheap. I don't really like that fact. Cause it means that when someone's birthday comes, or when Christmas comes, it means, getting broke. =( and that isn't good.

Number two! (Whoo...I accidentally typed 'Number three!') It's really hard to look for a perfect present. One would realise that he/she will be walking aimlessly looking for something that gives that 'pop!' feeling. Also, some gifts, when bought, may not be that personal anymore.

Number three! (Yay! Got it right this time) I never liked things that I do not use to be given as presents. I think it's useless and nonsensical. What do you do with a decorative item? You place it on the shelf and forget about it after a few months. Talk about sentimental value, huh? Key chains? Unless you're driving, there's really no use for one.

So this year? (And prolly my last Christmas in M'sia {if I get into UK}) I've resolved to making my own presents. Cost price is as cheap as it can be. It's as personal as a present can get. And it has a specific, useful (or many) function(s).

I'm a genius. =)

Best Friends Would...

2008-12-14T21:04:00.002+08:00

1. Sit beside each other in every class
2. Share recipes through MSN
3. Dress up in ugly clothes and take pictures together
4. Go for KLPac performances together
5. Buy presents that the other friend wants and needs
6. Message literally everyday
7. SMS each other's mums to ask if she can hug her best friend on her behalf
8. MMS silly pictures
9. Give the other person (who is stuck in bkt bintang) directions out of that place
10. Accompany the other person when she's going through a tough time
11. Tell each other silly driving stories
12. Bring each other's 12 year old siblings and try matchmaking them
13. Know where each other stays by heart
14. Know each other's guy history
15. Read the other person's blog from beginning to end
16.Call the other person up when she knows she's crying
17. Give fashion tips the other party when she's freaking out for a party
18. Bring the other person to the clinic when she's...uh...ill...
19. Give sound moral advice to the other person
20. Be the other person's rationale when her own rationale fails
21. Pray for each other in the middle of the carpark
22. Share Bible verses
23. Help the other person get over a stupid crush
24. Talk about her to every other friend
25. Have her as her phone wallpaper
26. Tell the other person she's being stupid, when she needs it
27. Promise to take dance classes with her after A levels
28. Promises to cut bangs if they go to the UK together
29. Cook each other means on *ahem* special occassions
30. Go out for no reason
31. Accompany the other person to buy her sibling's birthday present
32. Have 2,365,487 pictures of the other person in her phone
33. Tell each other virtually everything under the sun
34. Know each other's whereabouts
35. Tell her siblings night time stories that concerns the other person

Woman, these are only 35...We've been through wayyy more =)

Loves!

You Tell Me...

2008-12-10T23:56:00.001+08:00

chen han. says:
hey hey
chen han. says:
ask u
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
mmhmm?
chen han. says:
let say ur sibling was from helo
chen han. says:
help*
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
aha?
chen han. says:
how much discount will u get ar
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
huh where got such thing one?????
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
yerh! chen han!
chen han. says:
no ar?
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
this is not a kedai runcit lah!
chen han. says:
for taylors they do have!!
chen han. says:
ask around n see
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
you sure or not?
chen han. says:
ur help frens
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
they conn you is it?
chen han. says:
for taylors yeah
chen han. says:
for universities too
chen han. says:
many uni they do the same thing
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
huh???!
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
you sure or not?
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
first time i'm hearing these kinda thing
chen han. says:
sure!!
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
wh dont bluff me
chen han. says:
u ask ur frens n see
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
*eh
chen han. says:
yorrr
chen han. says:
=p
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
eh dont la
chen han. says:
dun believe me ar
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
after i malu
chen han. says:
fine
chen han. says:
really!!!
chen han. says:
no laaa
chen han. says:
whoa whoa
chen han. says:
u must find out the truth man
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
eh so stupid you know...suddenly ask ppl got discount
chen han. says:
whats that chinese cheng yu again
chen han. says:
mmmm wait wait
chen han. says:
mmmm
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
then i no face la
chen han. says:
bu chi xia wen!!!
chen han. says:
hahaha okay okayyy
chen han. says:
fine thanks yea
chen han. says:
hehe
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
lol
=miCHeLLe= www.michelleng74.blogspot.com says:
i'm putting this on my blog.

BLOG QUIZ!!!

2008-12-10T23:45:00.002+08:00

Who knows what makes Michelle cry??

=)

If you know me well enough, you should be able to answer this relatively simple question.

Don't reply in the Cbox. Reply in the Comments Box instead. =)

The winner will get a good prize. I promise. =)

Ooh ooh! And I won't tell when this quiz closes. It's up to my discretion. It's MY quiz, right?

Life

Song to choreo #2

Decisions

First questions human beings ask

Song to choreo #1

Convicted

Audience of One

Resolve

Post for Random Pictures of Germany

Alone in London?

For You Guitar Junkies

It's Snowed in London!

This is London

Because I Can't Concentrate

=)

For you who would be heading abroad,

pleasefindthis

OMIGOSHTHISISSOFUNNYIHAVETOPUBLICISETHIS!

On FB:

Aunt: Hello J Fu luckily still not over 12 ~~~ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU AND GOD BLESSED YOU AND YOUR FAMILY

Crutches

On Bended Knees

It's Almost the End of the Year

...anyway

I Should be Reading up on Public Law

Rough Hands

JOEL NG!!!

Look, Mum!

Dear Jesus,

London School of Economics to read Law??

5 Degrees and Chicken Soup

A Typical Night

Chestnut

Jason and Jeanine - One last breath

Nottingham Games

Braving Myself

Ironically..

I Promise to Start Work at 8

I Don't Know

On the Way to Lunch

=)

London

I Dunnoh

Dear You,

So They Say...

Made It!

Dear God,

Got It!

Easy or Hard?

=)

Sometimes

Dear You,

Thoughts

Of Exams

Things to do After A Levels

Too Guy?

2-0 Baby!!

Perfect =)

Sigh

A Lighthearted Post

Commitment

Hitting a Brick Wall

Whirlwind

Tagged

She

Isolation

Old Sayings?

"You're Very Fit Lah!"

Indescribable

Frus

First Impressions

Gah

Ramblings

John

I Once

Paroimia

Reason 1: It's by youths for youths (and everyone in and around this age circle)!Reason 2: It's thought provoking!Reason 3: There's good food involved! (smacks lips!)Reason 4: Awesome music, dancing, lighting and acting!Reason 5: I'll be in it!=)Miss it? DON'T!

Quote

HELP College Teaches Patience

The Boy in the Stripped Pajamas

Reason 1: It's by youths for youths (and everyone in and around this age circle)!
Reason 2: It's thought provoking!
Reason 3: There's good food involved! (smacks lips!)
Reason 4: Awesome music, dancing, lighting and acting!
Reason 5: I'll be in it!

=)
Miss it? DON'T!